TO BE A MAN
There exists a prevalent male fear of emotional involvement. To show emotion is almost equivalent to having teeth pulled without novocaine. Blind fear is the mask I observe when I witness this situation brewing. I do not apportion blame directly on them, as I have been in the similar predicament myself, in my formative years. I was always afraid of misinterpretation. Why this should perplex us, I am not sure, but it surely does in most cases.
How precarious our masculinity is, when faced by straightforward femininity. It is like oil and water, so does it appear not to mix. How can man deny the fact that women are so very strong and resilient to so many things that blight and bring a man to his knees?
Consider the image of woman as seen through the eyes of a man. What he considers her body and mind to be can in fact be the absolute opposite in her view, in terms of self esteem, desire, and our individual interpretation of what our mission on this earthly plain might be. Most women hope for a union with her chosen mate to involve tenderness, respect, and a singular desire to share common ground with sensitivity, and to feel complete when in the act of love and consideration. The male cannot alter the biological makeup of the woman. She has a birthright to expect to be honoured and loved, not to be subdued by force to fulfill some deep and disturbing whim of a man who should have known better.
Must we use a barrage of angry words to attack her when she is down? Must we force her to accept our weakness and inadequacies when we have chosen to forget our original promises in our attempt to gain sexual entry with the use of multiple lies and uneasy deception? How cruel the outcome often is. How unfair is the balance of responsibility. When the final outcome arrives, the lady has to circumnavigate her inner fears and uneasy trepidation, not to mention the workings of her body. The veil of desire can be torn down and thrown aside in the face of the male bully’s attempt to take and use what he has wrongly assumed was his for the taking.
How in Heaven’s name did man begin this forced march of betrayal? When did woman have to fall prey to this unreasonable behaviour, when we bully the very thing we need and want and desire more than almost anything else on Earth? How overpowering is the wonderment of woman? How spectacular is the hint of love? What other single happening can fulfill your mind and heart than the time spent with someone who allows you the splendour of shared togetherness?
There is no substitute for love when it is given and taken in the reciprocal act of being true and honest, when the fire of passion is first ignited by mutual desire and the belief that common ground has been agreed upon.
The ego of a man is worn like a suit of armour which in his mind is his born right. With this mentality and his invisible protective armour, he will stumble blindly from one unfeeling conquest to the next, leaving behind him a field of trodden-down flowers, broken hearts, and shattered dreams. Whilst some of these dreams are or were unreasonable and il-founded, it still cannot excuse the actions of a foolish, selfish man whose singular quest in life is to break down this delicate, if not precious thing, called woman.
In some cases, with a percentage of so-called adult males, there is something that is often missed or overlooked, and that is the fragile delicacy of the male ego. I have seen men broken by the fury of an unthinking woman, too. To see that frail ego splinter under the gaze of the woman with trouble in her heart, such an onslaught can affect an instant and irreversible case of fear, and push a man into social hibernation.
Please be sure I only mention this as it would be unfair to assume that all and every male is capable of administering pain and fear upon the opposite gender. So faint hearts can beat at a steady pace without a hint of guilt in their lives. We have all heard many times of women being damaged by men. I’m sure in the past I’ve caused damage too, but it wasn’t by fist or fire, it wasn’t by pushing or clubbing, at most it would have been a heated verbal exchange, or with selfish or insensitive actions. Even this much damage I may have caused leaves me with a touch of guilt. But we must also remind ourselves that there is a small percentage of good men with no evil in their hearts towards women, who have no desire to win with muscle and strength, nor with the concealed weapon of passive-agression, so it is to those few men that I dedicate my blog. Thank you for your decency, and thank you for your thought. I truly hope it passes down through your children, and that your goodness will only multiply in the future. I finish with a favourite quote of mine from Christian Nevell Bovee; “Next to God, we are indebted to women, first for life itself, and then for making it worth having”.
© Copyright 2011 John Levene Sgt. At Arms
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